Sunday, February 18, 2018

MOVIE REVIEW: The Girl On The Train Is The Feel Bad Movie Of The Year

( Tired of feeling too upbeat today? Wish you could spend 2 hours feeling a bit depressed? Well, you should definitely check this flick out. This movie is probably the most joyless couple of hours I’ve had at the theater in a long time. I was excited for this movie because I heard the book was awesome. Maybe people who read the book enjoyed this movie more than me but that’s not fair because the trailers didn’t say that I needed to read the book in order to fully enjoy the film.

Emily Blunt is, by far, the best part of this emotionally draining flick. She plays a drunkie who rides a train in a super gloomy town full of bland and unhappy people that all look like they have probably participated in the murder of a person or two in their lifetime. I can’t say much without sounding spoilery so just know that a crime is committed and Drunk Emily Blunt goes around trying to find out what happened and who did it and all that good stuff. I was expecting lots of twists and turns and I did get a few (emphasis on few) shocking revelations throughout the flick but some of them were because the filmmakers would show something on screen that misleads you in order to cheaply make the twists a little more startling.

I give this the “Checky™ Sticker of Tolerance!” definitely a very bleak film that you can wait to watch at home, ONCE. I am absolutely sure I won’t be buying this movie on blu ray and I will be totally fine if I never watch this again, EVER. This movie requires LOTS of patience or else you will be very bored. Once you watch it and know everything that happens, then there is no point watching it again. Unless, like I mentioned before, you are really jonesing for a bit of depression.

The only reason I didn’t give it the “Checky™ Stamp of Disappointment!” was because the cast did a real good job (even Hayley Bennett, who NEVER seems to smile) playing characters that make you feel sadness, fear and anger towards them all in the course of like 5-10 minutes. Other than that it was a pretty “meh” movie. If you do decide to go check this out, just make sure to have a playlist of cute puppy videos ready to watch and use as a palette cleanser after having this group of miserable and unfaithful people from the flick bring you down.

So, what did you think of The Girl on the Train? Have you read the book? Do you agree or disagree with me? Which flick are you checking out this week? What is your favorite book-based movie of all time? Let me know in the comments below. Have a great day at the movies and don’t forget to save me some popcorn.



About Ezequiel Torres

Ezequiel T is a Translator with a lifelong passion for movies who has been reviewing them for years and watching, discussing and sometimes making them for as long as he can remember. When reviewing them, he has a simple way of recommending a good movie by giving it The “Checky™ Seal Of Approval!” which is due to his childhood nickname. He currently lives in Victorville, CA with his wife of 10 years, Joanna.

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